Thais are taught from childhood to maintain jai yen (cool heart), public displays of anger are rather rare and generally do not achieve the desired effect. As you attempt to travel around the island, or anywhere in Thailand, you will undoubtedly be given ample opportunities to develop this skill for yourself. Thailand may be known as the "land of smiles", but trying to cross the street anywhere in the kingdom even at a marked crosswalk is literally taking your life in your hands. Thais may pride themselves on their polite behavior but while observing them attempt to operate motor vehicles, polite is unlikely to be the first adjective that comes to mind. On display daily are an array of driving skills, or lack thereof, that would logically conclude with the driver being admitted to an asylum, or being cremated. In a quirk of nature it seems those who operate a motor vehicle like an idiot, or while drunk, or ‘hopped up’ on amphetamines usually kill or injure the innocent. None of the above types of drivers are an endangered species on the island and to observe them in there natural habitat just walk outside on any street, you will not have to wait long. Fleeing the scene of an accident when at fault has become almost expected behavior throughout the kingdom. While driving (or walking) the unwritten rule of the road is the bigger and or more expensive vehicle always has the right-of-way, and can drive on whatever side of the road that pleases them. My intention is not to scare you, but to remind you that traveling in a foreign country can be as perilous as it is pleasurable.

Motorbikes
The warm balmy climate, the natural beauty of the island, and the winding mountain roads, all make Phuket a natural for cruising around on a motorbike. Motorbikes are the most common mode of transportation on the island. Motorbikes are also the most common cause of serious injury and death on the island. No statistics are available as to the number of motorbike injuries sustained by visitors to Phuket but the number is substantial. Insurance is not available on any rental motorbike. If it is damaged or stolen you will have to pay it’s for replacement plus any property damage or injuries caused to others. Phuket has and at times enforces a motorbike helmet law. The helmets available here are more for decoration then a serious safety device, but the fine for a driver without one is 500 baht. In Patong on the corner of Soi Bangla and Rat-u-Thit Road starting around 6pm and continuing to about 8pm the local police collect a little ’tea-money’ from motorbike riders without helmets. This money trap is so well known that motorbike taxis line up early to ferry you down and back to the police station to pay your fine. One cheap source of entertainment is to stand on the corner and marvel at the astonishing number of local Thais who although know about this blatant "rip-off" masquerading as traffic enforcement; but get caught without a helmet anyway. The daily rental rate for the small motorbikes like the ‘Honda Dream’ is 100-150 baht. The larger bikes rent for 300-500 baht, but in both cases the locals will be quite happy to charge the uninformed more.

Motorcycle drivers dressed in a green or maroon vests are providing a short trip taxi service. They are at times the fastest and cheapest way to get around. Simply wave one to a stop and ask for the fare to your destination.

Bus
There is a daytime bus service (songthaew) to most parts of the island. Songthaew (means two rows) which refers to the two wooden benches that run down each side of this colorful wooden-body public transport vehicle. All buses run on a loop route between a beach location like Patong and back to the songthaew stop on Ranong Road in Phuket Town. The bus fare between Patong and Phuket Town is 15 Baht, and the travel time is about thirty minutes. It is unfortunate they do not circle the island on the new ring road or travel from beach to beach, for example to travel from Patong seven kilometers south to Karon beach you must first take the songthaew 15 kilometers to Phuket Town transfer to another songthaew and ride approximately 20 kilometers to Karon Beach. Any effort to improve the bus service and or extend the hours of operation is violently opposed by the tuk-tuk (taxi) drivers who insist the competition will cut into there business. Compared with tuk-tuks a songthaew is generally a safer ride, with fewer hassles, from a driver who is more likely to be sane and sober, and at a fraction of the price of a tuk-tuk. Stiff competition indeed. One option is renting a songthaew with a driver by the day for touring the island or going on a beach Safari, the rate is quite reasonable when split among even a small group.

To arrange for the rental of a Songthaew tear out the following page, fill in the information, and ask someone at the front desk of your hotel to telephone the songthaew company (They do not speak English very well so you will need the assistance of someone who speaks Thai).

Taxi and Tuk-Tuks
(tuk-tuks) the notorious three-wheeled smoke-belching variety are now extinct on Phuket. They have been replaced with small red vans with open sides. The drivers have for the most part been allowed to nuture their nefarious reputations and continue to represent the largest source of complaints by visitors to the Tourist Police. The drivers fiercely fight any attempt to make them use meters. Generally tuk-tuk drivers (Mafia) show there displeasure at ant attempt to control them by blocking one or more major highways on the island. The authorities immediately buckle in the face of this pressure and rescind to offending requirement, leaving both residents and visitors to the island with a woefully inadequate, unruly, unsafe, and overpriced transportation service. Many tuk-tuk drivers like to double as travel agents - Don’t Do It!. They will normally only take you to a place that will pay them an additional commission over and above what they overcharge you for the ride in the first place. Contrary to conventional wisdom, taxis (tuk-tuks) are not a good source of information unless you enjoy being taken for a ride.

The standard rate for a ride from one point in Patong to another is 20 Baht, from Patong to Phuket is 150 Baht, from Patong to Karen Beach is 100 Baht, and from Patong to the airport (a forty five minute ride) is 450 Baht. A rainy day, a late night trip, a navy ship in port, or just about any other reason is an excuse to charge more but if you know the basics you should be able to negotiate a reasonable rate. The rate paid is by the distance traveled not by the number of passengers. If the driver wants to charge by the person wave him on and catch another.

Tuk Tuks are plentiful in Patong and Phuket Town but travel to many areas in the north or south part of the island may require you to negotiate a round trip rate because finding a tuk- tuk for the return trip may be difficult. It is generally not difficult to negotiate a rate with a tuk-tuk driver that has him sleeping in the parking lot while you walk around the national park, dine at a seafood restaurant, or watch the sunset at Cape Promthep. Start at 100 to120 Baht per hour depending on the distance to be traveled and be prepared to pay 150 Baht per hour.

In Patong at least half of the tuk-tuk drivers are polite, honest, and hardworking. Tuk-tuks that are driving around looking for customers are generally a better bet than the ones (perched like a vulture) waiting for you outside hotels and restaurants. The polite way to stop a songthaew or tuk-tuk on the street is to hold your arm out in front of you, palm down and make a up and down motion.

Long Tail Boat
The ubiquitous longtail boat is found wherever there is water in southern Thailand. The current version with the motor mounted on the back is just the latest modification on this ancient but quite seaworthy craft. Often called the workhorse of the Andaman Sea, longtails are used in to provide a number of marine services. While not as flashy or fast as modern speedboats, a voyage in a longtail boat is an interesting experience and a great way to take short sightseeing trips. The one serious disadvantage of the longtail is the almost complete lack of safety equipment such as lifejackets. Longtails are not advisable while traveling with small children or non-swimmers. Rental prices average 400 baht per hour for a short trips and up to 1000 baht for an entire day.